Saturday, July 25, 2009

7/25/09 Getting "High"

When I was young, I really wanted to get as 'high' as I could possibly get on whatever, though mostly pot. I wanted to get as "out of it" as I could. After about 7 years of that, I stopped altogether to see what life would be like, and here's what I found out.
1. I was chronically depressed before I ever tried drugs, so, at first, the drugs made me feel better. What amazed me later was to find out that, yeah, initially they made me feel better temporarily, but eventually that "being high" caused me to feel more depressed. After I quit, I felt much better overall.
2. My drug of choice, weed, takes away my motivation. Period. So, all my time not spent at work, I was spending getting high, and I wasn't happy with where I was at in general in life, but I also wasn't doing a darn thing to change it! I was just too busy getting high to make any changes in my life, or to work for something more. That was a vicious little circle, believe me!
3. All the other drugs are scary. I watched a special many years ago on how cocaine was made, and I was appalled. Then I heard how Meth is made, and let me tell you, I wouldn't drink a gallon of gasoline - I also won't do those drugs! Designer drugs with household cleaning products in them! Good Lord, there's only so much one body can take in abuse in one lifetime, and I don't feel comfortable taking any of them!
4. Now, I have drank alcohol over the years, but that has changed also. When I was younger, it was about getting "high", obviously. Then I gained a few years and began to have hangovers. That'll put it all into perspective! First, cheap sweet wines went out the window. Second, mixing different liquors, third, I began to make sure that I drank plenty of water beforehand and quit trying to eat food afterwards (not good for me!). Fourth, you decide that you don't need to get stumbling drunk so you try to find your "window" and stay there. Finally, you get a little buzzed and just go to bed. It ultimately becomes "not worth it!".
5. Getting high actually (on a spiritual level) disconnects you from the earth. This is why you can be so inspired and intuitional (connected to spirit) but you can't remember what your thoughts were, and you lack implementation (grounded or connected to the earth). We are meant to be creatures that strive toward balance in our lives (6=balance=harmony=good times), but getting high takes us out of that arena. If we do this often enough, we become fractured individuals and have no balance, no harmony, and ultimately, no good times. Ergo, depression (self loathing).
So, if you know someone that needs an education on drugs, here's what I learned over time about getting high. There is a place for it in our lives, but it is a small place that should never be given too much time or energy. We need to maintain our balance to fulfill our destiny(ies). -ag

2 comments:

  1. Very cool Ayesha. You are quite the writer yourself. The blog is like an online diary and I really like that you can share your thoughts so openly!

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  2. Thank you! Sometimes, I just need to hear it. I didn't know you could post a comment! This is cool....

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