tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9051746773503009722024-03-13T08:58:26.778-07:00Jimena RantsRandom thoughts from an inconsistant mind!Jimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.comBlogger20125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-72219783155930252512010-09-12T09:25:00.000-07:002010-09-12T09:31:17.892-07:00Sept 12, 2010 - Suffering<em>In the time of Buddha, a woman suffered the death of her only child. Unable to accept it, she ran from person to person, desperately seeking a medicine to restore her child to life. She was directed to approach the Buddha.<br /><br />She asked for a medicine to restore her child to life. The Buddha told her that to make this medicine he would need special ingredients. He told her that he needed a handful of mustard seeds from a household where no child, spouse, parent, or servant had died.<br /><br />The woman ran from house to house in search of the mustard seed. The houses she went to were happy to give her the seed. When she asked if death had ever visited their home, they all acknowledged that they had lost loved ones. The woman was unable to find a home free from the suffering of death. Seeing that she was not alone in her grief, the mother let go of her child’s lifeless body, and returned to the Buddha. He said, with great compassion, “You thought that you alone had lost a son; the law of death is that among all living creatures there is no permanence.”<br /></em><br />Suffering is something that we all experience; none of us will escape this law.<br /><br />We of the western society tend to believe that if we are suffering, we have somehow done some thing ‘wrong’, or that something must be ‘fixed’ in order to restore happiness. We have a tendency to not want to face our suffering, so we look for ways to escape from it. External escapes, such as addictions, entertaining a myriad of distractions, and chemicals; internal escapes such as denying or blaming; will in the long run, fail, and often times will cause the suffering to be greater. We can not escape the law that we will suffer in our lifetimes, but how we react to it, what we do when it is in our midst, is entirely up to us. And in this way, we can not only face our suffering, accept its inevitability, but perhaps learn some thing important in its wake.<br /><br />The Dalai Lama entertains a way to make this a little easier for ourselves. If we contemplate suffering in all its forms, then when it comes to us, it will be easier for us to face it, and easier for us to respond to it in a productive manner. This does not alleviate the suffering in the least bit, but it will help us to mentally prepare and not be blind-sided by it. Since it is a fact, a law, that suffering does occur; and since we see that there is more suffering in the world than contentment and happiness, we begin to understand that we will have to deal with it as a reality. Our attitude toward suffering can help us greatly in dealing with these issues as they arise.<br /><br /><em>‘I think that how you perceive life as a whole plays a role in your attitude about suffering. For instance, if your basic outlook is that suffering is negative and must be avoided at all costs, and in some sense is a sign of failure, this will add a distinct psychological component of anxiety and intolerance when you encounter difficult circumstances, a feeling of being overwhelmed. On the other hand, if your basic outlook accepts that suffering is a natural part of your existence, this will undoubtedly make you more tolerant towards the adversities of life.’</em> -Dalai Lama<br /><br />In accepting our lives in this place, it is important to not take an overall pessimistic view. The reason that all societies in the world have religion is that it stabilizes our place here, gives us a purpose and reason to exist at all, and gives us strength and sanity. If you can find your inner spirituality, no matter what your doctrine, than you can find the underlying objective to your life, and take the altruistic path. With this basis, you can see that every one is here to learn, not how to suffer, but how to live well in spite of suffering. We can learn to grow and progress through the teachings that are rooted in suffering. And we can better our spirits, since once we leave this world, our spirit is the only thing that we will be taking with us.<br /><br />In my mind, we are here to learn, to grow, to love, and to one day progress to the next step, or to find out way back to God-Home. Either way, this is my path, and it causes me to feel at peace. I am hoping that this will also give you a sense of hope and peace as well.Jimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-67866562699193029192010-09-09T19:35:00.000-07:002010-09-09T19:37:56.861-07:00Sept 9, 2010 Compassion is the KeyWhen the Dalai Lama was asked whether he ever gets lonely, he responded that he did not. When asked to elaborate, he said that this might be attributed to his compassion for all human beings. He looks for the positive in everyone that he meets, and that helps to set up a connectedness and warmth with them at that instance. And, although it may not always be greeted by others with a mirrored friendliness, it does put one in a position of changing their approach to encourage a more open exchange.<br /><br />Now, when you look at the teachings of Jesus, you hear the same ring of compassion. To approach everyone as your brother, your sister, not better than you, not worse than you, but the same, is the height of nonjudgmental living. It’s absolutely freeing, and the hardest thing I have every half-heartedly done!<br /><br />It’s very hard for me to practice this. I am Scorpio, and honestly do not harbor compassion for others easily. Disdain is probably more like it! But truly, I have practiced this technique some and found out that the response from other people was almost always good. And it astounded me! I hate to say this, but people that I normally would not talk to opened up to me very easily. People that I “assumed” where to good to speak to me, spoke with me. It awed and humbled me to know that I was (am) such a prick! <br /><br />I have always been socially retarded, I was very ‘closed off’ in school, and literally had to make myself speak to people at all in my 20’s. There was always this hierarchy in my mind, this person is better; this person is worse, etc. Always comparing and judging, always worrying about how I would look to other people. Absolutely exhausting, really! I worked on a lot of different issues, but this is one I still have to tackle in order to reach the state of grace that I want to achieve.<br /><br />It doesn’t come to me naturally, so I really have to exercise the techniques of approaching and responding to people from a stand point of compassion. I know that this will only help me to get by in this world. So here’s one of the issues I was speaking of in my bio, when I said “don’t ask her to practice what she preaches”. I know that I am lacking in this area of my life, and I know that I suffer for it, and the next step is to do the work necessary to make this habit.<br /><br /> And I don’t think the learning will stop until I am gone from this world.Jimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-46671327522742683752010-09-06T15:40:00.000-07:002010-09-06T15:43:55.499-07:00September 6 2010 - The Pursuit of HappinessWhen I was young, I was extremely unhappy. I was amazed to find out that not everyone had suicidal thoughts. I had a few people in my life to show me that I had some worth as a human, but not a lot of support from my main family unit. I know that a lot of us have come from the same place.<br /><br /> For my case, it was really the times that we lived in. The generation that my mother came from was taught to never speak of their troubles with anyone outside the home, and Psychiatry was still viewed as something for severe schizophrenics, not for your semi-functioning individuals. We as a society were just starting to see the worth in evaluating ourselves and our thinking, but most people kept everything repressed due to shame and/or conditioning. The majority was prone to say, “That’s just the way I am”, and leave it at that.<br /><br />I saw a few people in my life that were not depressed all the time, that were genuinely happy, and I wanted that. In the early 80’s I began to read self help books, and attending regular group therapy sessions.<br /><br />During the self-help craze of that time, we slowly began to examine who we were, where we came from, which leads to the next logical step…where are we going?.<br /><br />The pioneers in the field of depression wrote books that explained ideas that were totally new to me, and were of great help to me. They explained that our emotions are caused by out thoughts, and we control our own thoughts, so ultimately, we control our emotions. We were conditioned by our environment, society, family, etc., to think specific ways, whether they were helpful or hindering. What we could accomplish, however, was to break from the thinking that was negative, and promotes positive thinking in ourselves. This would in turn produce positive emotions for us. We were challenged to accept that we are a culmination of our choices, and not a slave to our circumstances.<br /><br />I took this idea, and I ran with it. Every time that I would hear myself say that I wasn’t worth anything, I would stop myself and change that into a positive. I am worth something. I am here for a reason, and I am in control of myself. It was hard, because my negativity was habitual, so the very first thing was to recognize what I was saying to myself, before I could change it into something self-affirming. But I stuck to this, and kept chasing my happiness, until it became habitual to change the negative into a positive. Not that I still don’t berate myself sometimes, but that I almost immediately analyze what I’m doing, and change it. It’s become my habit now.<br /><br />When I become anxious and nervous and scared, I would commence to do something I call “talk myself down out of the trees”. In my mind, I visualized an agitated monkey screaming and jumping from limb to limb, accomplishing nothing. I would have an internal dialogue like, “O.K., girl, let’s calm down and see what’s going on…figure out what’s important. You don’t need to be freaking right now…”. This exercise has been of tremendous value to me. At one point in my life, I started to have anxiety attacks, and I had already practiced this technique for quite a few years, so I used it when I had these attacks. It worked like a charm. And after about 6 months, I didn’t have any more attacks. And I never had to seek out drugs to moderate my mood.<br /><br />I can say that for the most part, I am genuinely happy. I realize that I have worth and real gifts to give to the world. Because I have practiced positive thinking and temperance in my emotional state, I have come to a place where I can trust myself not to go to far out “into the trees”. That even though I have the occasional ‘back-slides’, I can bring myself out of them and get myself back to a state of calm and love. I can do this, because it was my dream to have happiness, and I pursued the teachings of happiness, and I practiced the exercises of happiness.<br /><br />I’m telling you that you can do the same.<br /><br />♥ LOVE ♥Jimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-59214992265130041352010-08-25T03:54:00.000-07:002010-08-25T04:31:48.089-07:008/25/2010 Segue (a short story)When we sit to studies and duties laid before us, we are focused to a fine precision point. Very little disturbs our concentration when we are here. We are trained well. But some times the brain registers some thing “out of kilter” at the very edge of our attention, and this can distract us from our purpose. And it will distract us whether we welcome it or not. It registers as “off”.<br /> One day, hunched over my screen, I feel some thing “off” to the side. I look up, my feeble attempt at investigation. Walking into the room is a mysterious older woman, dressed in a long black tunic that fell almost to her shoes. She moved silently, almost gliding, across the floor. I was mesmerized.<br /> Her hair is yellow and short, but thick. She wears wire frame glasses, and (oddly enough), an anklet with bells. With each step she takes you hear the sharp, quick jingle. When you look in her face, though, you perceive that the anklet is not an expression of gaiety, but rather a warning, much like a bell on a cat’s collar. Her expression is enigmatic, hard to read, but she is aware of us all, although not looking directly at any of us. Now that I have noticed her, I am unwilling to be noticed by her, so I slink my head back in the direction of my studies, and watch out of the corner of my eye.<br /> The instructor doesn’t acknowledge her; it’s as if she doesn’t even exist in this world, gliding to her purpose. In one door, out another, back in another door, gliding out another. I am fascinated. Who is she…what is her function here? Should we be concerned? She doesn’t have a feel of a instructor, more so an outsider with authority and a mission to accomplish. I become anxious.<br /> I don’t want anything to disturb the balance of my life. I don’t want any one to interfere with my studies. I like it here, absorbing knowledge on an unprecedented scale. I know that the nature of all energy is to change, but I dread any change to this existence at all. I begin to resent her, because this is what she will require of us at some point. She represents our future, which is unknown, and unsettling. I can feel this all the way into my bones, and I decide that I will not be taken unaware. I will find out who she is, and what lies ahead for us. I will attempt to recruit others to this cause as well.<br /> I will know what lies ahead for us, all of us. I will find out what her plan is. More importantly, I will choose my own destiny, and not have a path chosen for me. I choose. Me.Jimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-1920072288727612062010-08-05T16:14:00.000-07:002010-08-05T19:56:22.460-07:00August 5th, 2010 More Hopi StuffWhen I’ve seen Native American medicine wheels (a cross within a circle), the colors I have seen associated with it were yellow, black, red, and white. I always wondered why the colors were not the primary colors and ‘something thrown in’. To be honest, it wasn’t “pretty” in my mind, but I think I get it now.<br /><br />I understand the significance of the number four. There are four directions, four elements, four seasons, etc. When thinking about that number, I feel that four represents solidity, strength, and stability, like the four legs on a chair. Three is better than two, less wobbly, but nothing offers protection and confidence like four. I also thought of another word to describe it, and that was ‘courage’. The stability of four lets us push the outer edges of the envelope. Having a solid foundation allows us to branch out to new and different things. If it doesn’t go well, you already have a place, a home, to head back to. You haven’t lost a thing. <br /><br />In regards to the four colors, in an article I was reading, Lee Brown, a Native American, was talking about the 4 races of man, and their significance in Hopi belief. He mentioned that the colors stood for the directions, elements, and the races of man. He said that the different races were related to the four elements: The black race is the guardian of water; the yellow race is the guardian of air; the red race is the guardian of earth; and the white race is the guardian of fire. He mentioned that the ‘fire’ race had to initiate the coming together of all races, as was our nature. He said that was why we were the race to bring machines and internal combustion engines, etc. The author also noted Dr. Charles Drew, an early 20th century Negro medical scientist, as a pioneer in the uses of blood plasma for patients needing transfusions, and that this did not surprise him at all.* We all have something to give to the whole.<br /><br />A quote from a different websites states:<br /><br /><em>A Medicine Wheel is a physical manifestation of Spiritual energy. An outward expression of an internal dialogue. A mirror in which we can better SEE what is going on within us. It is a wheel of protection and enables us, and allows us, to gather surrounding energies into a focal point and to commune with Spirit, Self and Nature (ALL elemental forces)........Creation!<br />It helps us with our "Vision," to see exactly where we are and in which areas we need to develop in order to realize and become our potentials. That we are all connected to one another, and by showing us the intricacies of the interwoven threads of life, what our part in it all is. It helps us understand that without our part in the tapestry the "Bigger Picture" is not as it should be. We add colour, dimension and life to each other, to all of life. No matter what colour, race or creed we are, we need each of us to create a beautiful existence and expression of the Whole. - Tree-Song<br /></em><br /><br />The medicine wheel represents us, individually, as well as the whole human race, at our very best. It reminds us to remain centered and focused on what is important. It shows us that together we can accomplish anything that is worthwhile. But without any one element, we may not be able to get the stability that we need to work from. It was mentioned in Lee Brown’s article that when this world is over, and we step over into the new world, we will all work together to survive and succeed, that we are all needed for this work.<br /><br />The eighth prophecy mentioned by Frank Waters is below:<br /><em>"This is the Eight Sign: You will see many youth, who wear their hair long like my people, come and join the tribal nations, to learn their ways and wisdom."<br /></em><br />The guardians of the fire have dominated the world, and the philosophies within that way of life, and this has created imbalance. Our society rushes ever head long toward more, more, more, and still it is not enough. The Hopi say that when the prophecies have come to pass, then they will need to slow down, not speed up. Then it is time to return to the old ways.<br /><br />I am starting to hear a call to ‘return’ myself. I have no desire to work for a corporation. I want to get some property out in the country, to plant a garden and learn how to become self sufficient. I want things to slow down. It is rushing by way too fast, and it is sometimes hard to catch our breath at this pace. We don’t have time to appreciate all the blessings that we have received. We don’t even have time to connect spiritually with God. <br /><br />I don’t want to be dependent on this society. The philosophies that are currently prevalent do not have my best interest at heart. We are encouraged to look at ourselves and see only our “lack”. It doesn’t matter how many ‘things’ we own, it doesn’t matter how many addictions we try to feed, it will never be enough. None of these ‘things’ will sustain our souls, and our souls are the only part of us that remains forever<br /><br />I hope I make it there.<br /><br /> <br />* http://www.blackinventor.com/pages/charlesdrew.htmlJimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-56699008763690169272010-08-01T19:37:00.000-07:002010-08-01T19:41:29.723-07:00August 1st, 2010 – Emotional PainI’ve been hearing a lot of people crying out for solace, for comfort, crying because the emotional pain they feel seems unendurable. They feel that if they lash out at others, their pain will be lessened. They forget how to be happy, and forget how to do the work that comes with being happy. They want the world to change to suit them and their desires, and they may very well lose their way. It is we who must change to suit the world.<br /><br />The world is not with out pain. However, it is also not without blessing. Have we counted our blessings lately? Have we looked to those around us and appreciated who they are, as they are right now? Or are we blind? We long for some ethereal “other” and forget about the people closest to us. We even push them away, thinking “This is best for everyone”. And we hurt the people around us.<br /><br />The world has always been dangerous and ironic. Life is unpredictable and full of challenges. Your pain is the same pain that your ancestors felt in their life times. They say there is nothing new under the sun, and in regards to human suffering, you can believe it. If you choose to medicate yourself from emotional pain, then you may miss something that you need to understand. If you continue to medicate to block your emotional pain, you will be visited with an addiction that will take you to the deepest, darkest wells, until you choose to live your life sober. This is the way of physical beingness.<br /><br />For people diagnosed with OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder), the treatment includes getting the patient to face their fears willingly. Once in the midst of what that person fears, they will ask the patient, “Where is your anxiety level, on a scale from one to ten”. The patient assesses and responds, but conquers their fear by staying in the midst. The therapist will ask a little later, and again a little later, and the patient soon realizes that at first the anxiety spikes up really hard, and then it slowly comes down. This is how they begin to see how their bodies respond to anxiety so they make some changes in their behavior to take back control of their lives.<br /><br />I believe that the emotional pain is like this. It spikes, and then comes slowly down if we allow ourselves to feel it, let it flow through us, and then let it go. We mourn, loudly at first, then more softly, then less often, and finally we release it. Let it go, simply put, means to forgive any transgressions and let God take care of it. Our mourning time is done, and although we may still feel the hurt, we have faith that everything is exactly as it should be. We can sigh, and get on with our life.<br /><br />In order to be happy, you must simply put, work at it. It will not arrive at your door and extend a hand. You have to appreciate and socialize with the people you care about, or at the very least, the people who care about you. You need to extend your hand to the people around you, and learn to love them despite their flaws. You need to consider treating everyone with respect and dignity, without prejudging who they are based on income and social standing, race, looks, etc. You need to find out what you can give that makes you happy, and then give it freely without expectation of return. You need to learn to forgive them and release the hurt associated with them. The continuation of these practices will keep you happy. The smiles you generate will fill you with joy. And know that we are in a unique moment in time, when we can honestly say that we control who we are, how we are, and what we do. We choose.<br /><br />The following passage is from Lee Brown, speaking at the 1986 Continental Indigenous Council.<br /><br /><em>And now it is us. We are the ones they spoke of long ago. They say to be alive, to come into creation and to live upon the earth at this time is a great honor. In the cycle of time, from the beginning to the end, this time we are in now will change the purification of all things. They say this is the hardest time to live, but it is also the greatest honor to be alive to live and see this. – Lee Brown</em>Jimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-60298172683477000332010-07-25T07:32:00.001-07:002010-07-25T07:45:59.838-07:00July 25, 2010 - Hopi Prophecy<p><br />I did not write this, but I can see where we are in the progression of the signs, and I felt a need to communicate this to you. The prophecies below are a small part of the prophecy of the Hopi. There is much more that they say, but these are the signs to the ending of the Fourth World, and the beginning of the Fifth. </p><p><br /><em>"The Fourth World shall end soon, and the Fifth World will begin. This the elders everywhere know. The Signs over many years have been fulfilled, and so few are left.<br />"This is the First Sign: We are told of the coming of the white-skinned men, like Pahana, but not living like Pahana men who took the land that was not theirs. And men who struck their enemies with thunder.<br />"This is the Second Sign: Our lands will see the coming of spinning wheels filled with voices. In his youth, my father saw this prophecy come true with his eyes -- the white men bringing their families in wagons across the prairies."<br />"This is the Third Sign: A strange beast like a buffalo but with great long horns, will overrun the land in large numbers. These White Feather saw with his eyes -- the coming of the white men's cattle."<br />"This is the Fourth Sign: The land will be crossed by snakes of iron."<br />"This is the Fifth Sign: The land shall be criss-crossed by a giant spider's web."<br />"This is the Sixth sign: The land shall be criss-crossed with rivers of stone that make pictures in the sun."<br />"This is the Seventh Sign: You will hear of the sea turning black, and many living things dying because of it."<br />"This is the Eight Sign: You will see many youth, who wear their hair long like my people, come and join the tribal nations, to learn their ways and wisdom.<br />"And this is the Ninth and Last Sign: You will hear of a dwelling-place in the heavens, above the earth, that shall fall with a great crash. It will appear as a blue star. Very soon after this, the ceremonies of my people will cease. </em></p><p><br />The ceremonies cease for a time, and then resume to a new world.<br /><br />If you look at recent events, you see that we have experienced (and I wouldn’t be surprised) will still experience the Seventh sign. We are fast approaching a very different world order. I think it is time to ready ourselves for what is to come.<br /><br />-ag</p>Jimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-40364280413665941152010-07-22T21:10:00.000-07:002010-07-22T21:30:12.198-07:00July 22, 2010My friend has challenged me to a duel! The best kind of duel!<br />We are to write in our blogs once a week.<br />Cool,<br />Here goes….<br /><br />OK, so a billion years ago (not that long, really) I fell in love with a “taken” man. And that never culminated into anything, so I fell in love with another “taken” man. ‘Those who forget the past are doomed to repeat it’ they say. This one did result in a relationship. It didn’t end well…lol<br /><br />Because at first, you see, I convince myself that I will not get serious about said “taken” man, I’m only here for the vo-de-o-do. After awhile, however, I begin to resent the time and energy spent away from me. Meanwhile, he’s thinking he has it made, and only beginning to wonder if I might be getting too attached.<br /><br />His intuition is right, and I am getting way too attached. And I’ll tell you why. Deep down in my little girl soul I long and yearn for a true relationship with a man. I don’t want to admit it, but I do, and there is no cure for that.<br /><br />So my anger starts to eat me, and I start ‘picking away’ at this man. He starts to wonder why he even went there with me, and starts appreciating his significant other more. From there, it’s either a long, slow death spiral, or someone gets merciful and ends the agony quickly.<br /><br />Either way, I lose. I lose a relationship that I invested in, I lose the man, and I lose a little self respect. I wrote this down in the hopes that I don’t repeat my history. Wish me luck…I’m not perfect!<br /><br />-agJimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-80157134112794037772010-05-15T08:15:00.000-07:002010-05-15T08:17:56.069-07:005/12/2010 Conglomerate CorporationsI became aware of the outside world in the 70’s, and as a child of that generation, I truly believed in mankind’s ability to change the world for the common good, and I believed that my generation was going to be the one to affect that change. Don’t get me wrong, I still believe we create our world and direct where it goes, but I am highly disappointed that on mass, we have created the society that we have now.<br /><br />In the 70’s, people still worked their jobs for 30 years or more and retired with benefits from the corporations that they worked for. They could still be hired without a college degree and, with hard work and dedication, they could still make a living and look forward to a time when they would be allowed to rest.<br /><br />Individuals built up companies in their garages, looked and planned for a future, and turned these same small companies into money making organizations. These entrepreneurs knew every aspect of their business because at some point or other, they had sat and worked this position. These individuals also knew all of the employees that worked for them. They knew the families of their employees, and watched their kids grow over the years. Everyone had a vested interest in seeing the company grow more and more each year, so not only did they have a future, but their children had one as well. They looked out to see where they were going and how they were going to fit in to the future economy in order to make their profit. They valued their independence and self sufficiency. We didn’t realize it yet, but we were in the midst of a golden era regarding entrepreneurships. We were still human beings, and not just a number.<br /><br />Somewhere between there and now, conglomerate-type corporations of the world began to ‘gobble’ up these individually owned companies in order to diversify their investment. They wanted to mitigate the risk of having all their eggs in one basket, and this was seen as the way to protect the investment. So instead of being an expert in what they were doing with one basket, they gave up expertise for volume. They chose to buy 5 more baskets, and hire 5 managers to look after their interests, instead of putting that money back into the original company to update and keep ahead of the competition. Basically, that says to me that you have very little faith in your abilities to keep a company running and healthy. Hmmmm.<br /><br />Instead of having knowledge and control of a product or service, they gave all that away. The passion of the original entrepreneur is lost, the passion to build something meaningful and productive from an idea or product. The passion is gone, and the bean counters rule, because it isn’t about common sense anymore, it’s just about the money. It’s about the next raise and the next bonus and the next promotion. No longer do we work for a company for 30 years to retire from it. Now the professionals of the world work for a company for 5 years average and move on. Since they are not going to be with the company for a lifetime, are they going to worry about the long term plan? They’ll set the goals and sit in boardrooms discussing it all, but do they really have an invested interest in what the company is doing 30 years down the road? No, they do not. They realize that they will not be there then, and they have to prove their worth to the current management in place (who will not last at their jobs for any length of time, either) by proving how they are saving the corporation money and improving processes constantly, and they have to do this today. Returns are to be grand and immediate. The level of greed that they are working with has high expectations of a hefty, quick return. If they don’t prove today that they are saving tons of money for the investors, they will be out of a job tomorrow, and they know it. They create and manipulate data for their spreadsheets and power point presentations that “prove” that they are really worth the money paid to them, and to keep for their portfolio when they are searching for their next position.<br /><br />Gone are the days when the individual owner would use current profit to further the company in the next 10 or 20 years, knowing that this year’s profit would be weak because of that decision. Gone is the passion to provide and produce quality services and product, knowing all along that it will cost more to insure that quality. Gone are the days when the owner knows the name of your spouse and children, and has a vested interest in your level of stress and happiness.<br /><br />Now you are just a number, and a number that costs (bottom line). It no longer matters that your spouse/child/parent is having medical difficulties. You will either fit into the mold provided, or you will be eliminated. It no longer matters that rising cost of living has affected your ability to subsist at all. You will either fit into the mold provided, or you will be eliminated. It doesn’t matter that you have been a loyal and true worker for years. They can find someone with less experience out there to do your job for less money. No matter that you know what you are doing, and how to get it done efficiently. You are perceived as a drain on the corporation, and not an asset. You will be eliminated.<br /><br />We lack self esteem, because no matter what we do on the job, unless we can prove that we are saving the company our wages plus five other people’s wages (on a colorful and complicated spreadsheet), we have no worth, and we are a drain. We lack security because nothing that we do is good enough for management. No matter what we have done, they will continually ask for more. We lack faith as we see how other worker’s have been treated during times of individual turmoil and upheaval. We know that in today’s market, we are nothing.<br /><br />Now, I’m not going to blame any political party or any elite group residing in the world today for this skewed existence. The world that we live in today was created by us…all of us. Because when you look at the basic tenets of these corporations, it is all about greed. They have to have immediate and substantial profits at every quarter – a year from now is too late! And that is what each and every one of us (who have been sucked in by this philosophy) has come to want as well. We want the large four bedroom home with the vaulted ceilings in the good neighborhood, and we want this within the year, not ten years down the road. We want all the amenities, the appliances, the cable tv attached to every tv set in the house. We feel we need the individual cell phones and laptop computers for every member of the household. And we want it now.<br /><br />We don’t want to wait to save the money to avoid interest rates and monthly bills. We refuse to wait even a small amount of time to afford our wants. We want it now, and we’ll buy it all on credit. We don’t care that our future employment should never be a ‘given’, we don’t want to think of that. We just know that we want something, and we want it now. Kind of sounds like a child, huh?<br /><br />Our greed and lack of foresight are the driving forces behind our society, and this is reflected in the way our society is set up. This is ‘acceptable’ to us, because it allows us to gratify our wishes fairly immediately with tons of items to make our lives more convenient. We do not, as a society, go ‘without’ today so that we can ‘have’ tomorrow. We do not consider the consequences of our decisions and actions today, to ensure a better tomorrow for our children and for the planet we live on. We want what we want and we want it now. <br /><br />We are the conglomerate corporations, gobbling up as many items as we can right now, to stave off the insecurity we feel inside. We are the ones to devalue ourselves because we don’t own enough ‘bright and shiny’ things. No amount of money will ever be enough to keep us from being afraid from what tomorrow will bring. So we will raid and pillage today with no thought of tomorrow.<br /><br />We are the disease. Our thoughts are ‘skewed’ and drive us to act without foresight. The society that we build is a reflection of who we are. We have to heal ourselves and our fears while considering the benefit to others and our world, in order for our society to reflect that change. We are responsible for the world and what we manifest in it, and we need to take the responsibility seriously.<br /><br />The changes have to come from within each and everyone of us, before it can be reflected into the outer world. Are you willing to take that step?<br /><br />*Jimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-17234008671296840222009-11-29T14:14:00.000-08:002009-11-29T14:29:11.291-08:0011/29/2009 - Aye, yih, yih!Well, I’ve managed to forget just about everything I said just a month ago. My intentions are great, my follow-threw blows! Ding Dag Nab It!<br /><br />What would it take to be mindful of God, appreciate my good qualities, forgive my bad ones, and make peace in my heart? What would it take to clean off my table and pull out my sewing machine? What would it take to grab my guitar and sit down to a daily session? What would it take?<br /><br />A rubber band around my wrist, maybe? A daily affirmation from some new age internet site? Something I would see every day and be mindful of – I need some lipstick so I can write on my mirror!<br /><br />I’m not as bad as I think, and not as good as I act, ya know? -agJimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-40340561795954943382009-10-22T21:09:00.000-07:002009-10-22T21:38:27.368-07:00<span style="font-family:arial;">10/22/2009 Oh, I Get It!<br /> <br /> So I don’t understand why I don’t feel connected to anything, and I this whole year has been a struggle with addictions, and I’ve gained weight and haven’t really conquered the cigarette addiction yet, and I’ve found myself spending too much time thinking about relationships that will never happen…and it’s been like the first 40 some-odd years of my life, only times 10!<br /><br /> So why am I so disconnected? I know what I want to do, and I wasn’t doing it, and I wasn’t all that concerned about doing it, and I’ve gotten so fat I don’t even recognize myself in the mirror! So, I’m thinking, “what has gone wrong?”<br /><br /> And then I get it. My relationship with God has been neglected. I started praying (actually about something entirely different) and ended up realizing that this is the one area that I really haven’t made any strides to get back. And this is the one place where I need to get back.<br /> <br /> I don’t adhere to traditional Christian organized religions – I find them too restrictive, dogmatic, and neglectful themselves to the underlying message of Christ, which is Love. I heard all the “burn in hell, sinners” in my younger years, and I’m all done with that. But I have spent a good deal of my adult years studying religion and coming to peace with it through a metaphysical / new age point of view. I believe in reincarnation, I believe that all souls must eventually come home to God (Love), and I believe that the teachers that were sent here on earth should be known by their works. I hold Christ in great esteem because he was showing us who we could all become, if we have faith and hold God close to ourselves. He carried the Christ Consciousness that is available to all, and taught us that we too are the children of God, and “these things you can do also”.<br /><br /> And somewhere along the line, I neglected to let God help, and be a part of my recovery. The addictions are self hatred expressed – no doubt in my mind. The hatred of self sets up barriers to God and to the Christ Consciousness, and it escalates from there, to be expressed by more addictive behavior. I have failed to allow love into my heart…love of self (addictive behaviors), love of others (I am guilty of ridicule, which is completely disrespectful), and love of life (I wish that things were different! Woe is me…).<br /><br /> I don’t believe 100% of the bible – I believe that a lot of people, having access to that power, would further their own agendas through the biblical translations, no doubt. So I adhere to the teachings that feel true to me. Christ states that he is the child of man, and that we are all the children of God, and only through God is anything that he does possible. So today, and hopefully everyday hereafter, I will be mindful…God is here, with me, always. I can always have God with me at all times. I need to foster love of mankind, love of self, and love of life, so I can receive the grace of God, and feel the glory of God. I need to nurture this everyday so I can get closer to the person that I need to be to fulfill my destiny. And so I can teach my daughter these things. Because she needs to know that God is always with her also.<br /><br />-ag</span>Jimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-5777838277216482412009-09-26T07:36:00.000-07:002009-09-26T07:37:03.430-07:009/24/2009 Weary am IFighting and not fighting the smoking issue has been interesting. I smoke, than I don’t smoke for 3 or 5 days, then I smoke for 1 or 2; this is really weird and very different from the last times I quit. I don’t get it, except for I did express a wish that I could be one of those people that smoke sometimes, but not all the time…you know, the friend that smokes when you go out to drink, but doesn’t smoke the day after, etc. Always this fascinated me, because I’ve always said I was “all or nothing”, but this time I am proven wrong. Kind of weird, I don’t know where this will lead.<br /><br />But with my voice getting back into shape, you would think I would be grabbing the guitar and going to town…writing down my existing songs, and making up some new ones. But, no, I haven’t allowed for that kind of activity. What I have been doing (being the Scorpio that I am) is obsessing about men that I know, craving you-know-what. I have been desperately trying to trade an addiction for another one, and not in a healthy way. Problem: thoughts are things. These men are too close for comfort; I see them way too often.<br /><br />Solution: The only men I am going to fantasize about from now on are public figures who are far removed from me and get hundreds of fantasies on the God/Source World-Wide-Web everyday, and can not distinguish me from the hundreds of other adoring fans. I simply can not endanger my mental health, and I certainly can not intrude on others psychic web sites any longer. Not good for anyone.<br /><br />I’m going to re-read ‘Manifest your Destiny’ by Dr. Wayne Dyer, and get back to what is important. It’s important to substitute a good addiction for a bad one; it’s good to pursue your path of destiny. I know I need to get back to music, I know that it makes me feel good, and I have always known that this is the one thing that I do that is good for me in every way. I need to do this for my self, my child who looks up to me to teach her, and my community that needs to know the depths to which we can feel and emote; to share the passion in art.<br /><br />I’m going to do all the things I need to do, and clean out the cellar completely. The pipes are clogged again, and need to be opened. Anyone have a snake?Jimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-23059045252158521062009-08-25T18:24:00.000-07:002009-08-25T18:29:26.263-07:008/25/09 The Plot Thickens!Oh, my, I just didn’t realize how deep this all went. So, as I said before, I am still on the road to quit smoking (I’ve had a couple of drags this week) but it has really dredged up a lot of issues that I sure didn’t want to deal with! So, I realized that I wanted a relationship to fill the gaping hole in my life, and I started to think ‘thoughts’ about a married man that I know.<br /><br />Thoughts are things, and nothing has brought this home to me like the experiences that I have had within the last year. This year I have finally been able to connect the dots between my thoughts, and the reactions that I have had from other people. The reactions that I have noted have been obvious and immediate, and there has been no mistake that there is a correlation. This brings us back to our own connectiveness within the collective, and how we may feel isolated from others, but we are in no way alone.<br /><br />Now, let me tell you of my most recent observation. I’ve really fallen in love with three men in my life, and this week I looked at the similarities for the first time.<br />1) They all three were married. Not a shock to me, I already knew that I had an issue there, probably of the “I only want what I can not have” variety. <br />2) They all take care of their wives financially. This I hadn’t realized in the past, but there is an issue within me there, as well. In other lives past, I’m pretty sure that I was ‘taken care of’ by other people, and I also know that this life I was supposed to practice taking care of myself. Apparently there is a belief in me that the ‘gaping hole’ will be filled if I don’t have to go to work everyday, don’t have to work for a living. This is erroneous, I know on a conscious level, but how do I convince my subconscious…?<br />3) They all made me laugh. None of them look the same, or have the same sense of humor, but all of them make me laugh a lot. And I love them for it. That will remain as a requirement for anyone wanting to have a relationship with me. <br /><br />In one of those relationships, I didn’t go there. I’d like to think that was because I was best friend’s with the wife, but truly, I had no self esteem, and couldn’t imagine anyone ever wanting to be with me. In the second relationship, I did go there, and I told myself at first that I wouldn’t “care” about him, I would just sleep with him, get what I want, and have a very cavalier, “adult” attitude about it. I couldn’t have been more wrong! It took me no time at all to start resenting the time he wasn’t with me, and harboring hopes that the relationship he was already committed to would fall apart. When that didn’t happen (hello!), I was depressed and inconsolable, and miserable to be around (just ask my friends). This was the progression of my disease.<br /><br />So, back on track. I’m thinking thoughts that I should not be thinking, and I’m harboring hopes that I should not be hoping, and as I’m talking to him, I realize that he is making constant references about his wife. Fine with me, but it seemed a bit much, and not connected to the conversation. And that’s when I realize.<br /><br />He is a very stable, steady kind of guy, and he has already made up his mind not to go there with me. He may have harbored a thought or two 6 months ago, maybe a year ago, but he definitely is not there now. I think that he thought about who he is and where he is, and saw that it would not be to his (or anyone else’s) benefit to go there, and so he will not. And I could feel the shift, I think, and almost tell you when this happened. Because thoughts are things, and on some level, I felt this shift in him as much as he could feel my thoughts.<br /><br />And he has been very kind to me, and will continue to do so, because he really does care about me. And I’ll go on loving him for now, since he has saved me from an old abyss. But the hardest thing is for me to look at myself and my own behavior though this whole thing.<br /><br />I thought that I would just ‘take what I could get’ with him, but just like the second guy, that wouldn’t have worked in the long run. And I really can’t lie to myself about that any longer, it’s a repeat issue. Sooner or later I would resent his attention being elsewhere, and I would become miserable and start to pine away for him, because in my heart I would want him to fill that gaping hole in me (impossible, you know) and show me he loved me by taking care of me (here we go again).<br /><br />And I was willing to become an interloper in a relationship that I had no right whatsoever to interfere in. These men are committed to women that they have built an entire world with, woman who have stuck with them through thick and thin, and for all their flaws, love these men. Take the truth in that, and mix it with the idea that these women have never fended for themselves completely out there in the real world, and would be lost without their significant other. The men that I love are all very loyal and committed, not the fly-by-night kind of guys. Of course, they would not leave their original love. And, of course, a wiser “me” would never ask them to.<br /><br />So, as usual, the worse thing is seeing the truth in my behavior and owning my own mistakes. Sucks, but that’s where I am. After grieving (and I still am, a little), I felt better, and I sort of renewed my own commitment to myself. These men can not fill the gaping hole in me, only God/Source can. The only way I can really connect to God/Source easily is to play my music, write my songs, and bleed my heart (i.e. create). So, I’m off to write, sing, dance, and create. No more stupid, destructive distractions, I hope. No more pining for married men, I hope. I want to be a better person, really, and not set myself up for disaster just because that’s what I know, and it’s familiar. I think I want to be more ‘real’ and myself than that.<br /><br />Wish me luck – I have a very hard head, and have a tendency to hang on to what I know. -finJimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-88112781629864108152009-08-08T07:10:00.000-07:002009-08-08T07:14:02.710-07:008/8/09 Quitting SmokingSo I’ve been smoking cigarettes for 30+ years, and I’ve know for about 25 of those years that I needed to quit. The weird thing is, when I was younger, I told myself that I would only smoke until I was 40 years old, and then I would quit. Then it became 45 years old, and now that it’s a little more than that…Spirit has been calling for me to quit since October of last year, and very loudly, I might add.<br /><br /> I tried to ignore this message, because I really enjoy smoking. It’s a pain to have to have cigarettes on your person at all times, and it’s a pain to go outside to smoke (even at your own house), but with all of that, I still enjoyed sucking the smoke into my lungs. So I was very reluctant. But when you think of the expense and the obvious health risks, it seemed stupid to invest my money in something that would never do me any real good. So, I finally put them down…for now. <br /><br />Here are my observations regarding my recovery:<br /><br />1. Nicotine is not really the big issue for me. I don’t exhibit a lot of physical withdrawal symptoms when I quit smoking (cold turkey method). For me, 99.9% is the habit: the physical action of putting my hand to my mouth and keeping it there for the moment, sucking in the smoke, and blowing it out.<br /><br />2. And when I quit, it dredges up (out of my deepest, darkest psyche) my loneliness and longing for a partnership/relationship. Can you believe that?<br /><br />To give you a bit of background, I have quit two times before, once for 6 months and once for about 3 or 4 months. Each time, this loneliness and longing comes to haunt me like a familiar specter. Each time I’m not only dealing with giving up a very ingrained habit, but also dealing with old issues that I thought were taken care of long ago. In the past, it really freaked me out. What is the relationship between my lack of companionship and my need for smoking cigarettes? And I think when the loneliness finally became too much for me to deal with (because that was not an issue I had come prepared to deal with), I think that I took up smoking again.<br />This time, I am not surprised, but I had forgotten that these two issues were so linked in my soul. Now in order to be successful, I have to deal with my feelings of inferiority. Crap! I ain’t got enough on my plate, already?? I hate dealing with this on top o f the quit smoking routine. Who knew that cigarettes could be a surrogate boyfriend! And I really want a cigarette right now!<br /><br />My oral retentive personality is shoving food into my mouth to compensate for the lack of comfort, which causes me to gain weight and make me even more unattractive to the opposite sex to ensure that my loneliness remain a viable issue for me. I ain’t small, ladies and gentlemen, I am MORBIDLY obese (a beast?) and you add a few more pounds on top of that, and that ain’t purdy! So you can see the “Wheel of Pain” moves around and around and around…..<br /><br />There is a way to get a grip on all of this, and I am going to find it. I want to quit, mainly for my daughter’s sake, so that she knows that whatever she puts her mind to do, she can do. I want to quit for my health and well-being, and I want to save my money for fun things to do. I will HAVE TO deal with my longings for a partner-relationship, or else this time I will not make it, again. That sucks, but that’s where I’m at, so this also needs to be dealt with. Wish me luck, ‘cause I’ve had that particular cave shut off for quite some time, and getting the light and air in there, and cleaning out the muck, will probably take some real effort and time.<br /><br />Send me good will and keep me in your prayers. I am most definitely going to need it! -finJimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-52781800423822054412009-08-02T07:34:00.000-07:002009-08-02T09:11:15.553-07:008/1/09 Parasitic relationshipsWhile playing at my online game, I noticed something that I hadn't noticed before. A person asked to be my friend, I accepted, and later this person would show up unasked to step into my gaming 'battles'. I usually have no problem with this, as this game promotes helping your fellow gamer out. This person, however, did nothing to assist, but merely hung out, gaining experience points and levels, while I was doing all the work. He said, "I have the boss", so I watched and gave him some free reign to get the 'boss'. Did he? No. Finally I had to kill the boss and be done with the battle. Then I removed him from my friend's list. Quite simply, this person is a parasite.<br /><br />Then I attend a party with a relatively new group to me, and had a little knowledge beforehand on two of the couples there and their relationship with one another. I saw a third couple there that also exhibited the same energy. Let me explain. Partner A in all these couples are the wounded ones, the ones that never seem to hold down a job, never have good energy to bring to the table, and are jealous, mean and disruptive with their spouse. Partner B in all of these couples provide resources, take on the awesome resposibility of 'A's mental health issues, and take an awful lot of abuse for their troubles. Partner A is the parasite, and Partner B is the host. <br /><br />In my younger years I would have thought that the parasite was "misunderstood" and feel badly for them, because, obviously, they were "wounded", and needed my assistance to reach a higher level of existance, to become a productive member of society AND the person I wanted them to be.<br /><br />Hi, my name is Jimena, and I am co-dependent!<br /><br />Now, because of all the experiences that I have had, and all the things that I have seen, I do know a few things, and here they are:<br /><br />1. A parasite will never change as long as someone is catering to their every whim (hint, YOU!). Because we reward their crappy behavior with our continued presence and resouces.<br /><br />2. Whatever they accuse you of doing, that you would never think of doing until they actually accused you - they are doing that very thing. Watch your back!<br /><br />3. They will say and do whatever it takes to keep you there with them, providing them with whatever you are providing. And they will do <strong>what they want to</strong> when you are not looking.<br /><br />4. They will try to cause disruption in the host's life through friends, family, jobs, etc. They are <strong>very, very insecure</strong>, and need to know that the host will never have an epiphany that will take them away from this very, very dysfunctional situation. Communication with others can bring insight, and believe you - me, they don't want the host to know that there are better choices out there!<br /><br />5. A parasite has lost their connection to the God/Source, so be prepared for:<br /> a. They are miserable, and can only be happy if they are able to cause misery in others. It makes them feel like they are in control, and it keeps the playing field 'even'.<br /> b. They are selfish to the selfish extreme. They do not know how to love, and you will not teach them how, either. They have lost their ability to be compassionate to others, so all relationships are always about CONTROL.<br /> c. They have no way to 'refuel' themselves through God/Source, so they will feed on the energy of others, and the host, most especially. After dealing with them, and after confrontations with them, you will be drained of all energy, which is specifically designed to keep you from moving away from the situation.<br /> <br />And lastly, I must say, most of the 'hosts' that I have known over the years become less and less themselves the more time they spend in these relationships. It's like they become a shadow of themselves and their former glory. They become harder to speak to, and less able to hear. They withdraw into themselves more, and find other avenues of escape. They have somehow taken on the darkness of the parasite and carry this around with themselves, which is a sad waste of life.<br /><br />Do not delude yourself into thinking that you can or will have a positive influence upon these parasites. Be aware that they most assuredly will have a negative influence upon your own life.<br /><br />Understand that there is a darkness, a place that needs healing, within ourselves, that we need to search for and be compassionate with. Because otherwise, we would not be looking to drink from dark waters when we thirst. -agJimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-28814044561030263592009-07-25T05:39:00.001-07:002009-07-25T06:13:25.392-07:007/25/09 Getting "High"When I was young, I really wanted to get as 'high' as I could possibly get on whatever, though mostly pot. I wanted to get as "out of it" as I could. After about 7 years of that, I stopped altogether to see what life would be like, and here's what I found out.<br /> 1. I was chronically depressed before I ever tried drugs, so, at first, the drugs made me feel better. What amazed me later was to find out that, yeah, initially they made me feel better temporarily, but eventually that "being high" caused me to feel more depressed. After I quit, I felt much better overall.<br /> 2. My drug of choice, weed, takes away my motivation. Period. So, all my time not spent at work, I was spending getting high, and I wasn't happy with where I was at in general in life, but I also wasn't doing a darn thing to change it! I was just too busy getting high to make any changes in my life, or to work for something more. That was a vicious little circle, believe me!<br /> 3. All the other drugs are scary. I watched a special many years ago on how cocaine was made, and I was appalled. Then I heard how Meth is made, and let me tell you, I wouldn't drink a gallon of gasoline - I also won't do those drugs! Designer drugs with household cleaning products in them! Good Lord, there's only so much one body can take in abuse in one lifetime, and I don't feel comfortable taking any of them!<br /> 4. Now, I have drank alcohol over the years, but that has changed also. When I was younger, it was about getting "high", obviously. Then I gained a few years and began to have hangovers. That'll put it all into perspective! First, cheap sweet wines went out the window. Second, mixing different liquors, third, I began to make sure that I drank plenty of water beforehand and quit trying to eat food afterwards (not good for me!). Fourth, you decide that you don't need to get stumbling drunk so you try to find your "window" and stay there. Finally, you get a little buzzed and just go to bed. It ultimately becomes "not worth it!".<br /> 5. Getting high actually (on a spiritual level) disconnects you from the earth. This is why you can be so inspired and intuitional (connected to spirit) but you can't remember what your thoughts were, and you lack implementation (grounded or connected to the earth). We are meant to be creatures that strive toward balance in our lives (6=balance=harmony=good times), but getting high takes us out of that arena. If we do this often enough, we become fractured individuals and have no balance, no harmony, and ultimately, no good times. Ergo, depression (self loathing).<br /> So, if you know someone that needs an education on drugs, here's what I learned over time about getting high. There is a place for it in our lives, but it is a small place that should never be given too much time or energy. We need to maintain our balance to fulfill our destiny(ies). -agJimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-59404347161989460822009-07-25T05:13:00.000-07:002009-07-25T05:35:04.159-07:007/25/09 Obama's Heath Care PlanOk, first, I listened to our new presidents news conference, and, hey, I'm sorry, but I still like the guy! He's smart, and he is more than willing to stick his neck out there, even if it's just to get loped off! And, I tell you, that I have watched the shrinking of the middle class, and the ever-widening gap between the "haves" and the "have-nots", and I am appalled that the richest in our country are the biggest babies in the world about spending money. They act like they are entitled to the money, and that it's not a gift of spirit, and they are wrong!! They act like they owe nothing to the rest of us, but they do, and this is why.<br /> 1. I am your brother/sister, however you want to say it. All the major religions of the world say it, and that is because it is true. If you let me down, then you let a little piece of yourself down as well.<br /> 2. The difference between what a doctor "makes" in a year has changed dramatically in the last 50 years. Doctors could and did make good money, but a good portion of them practiced in places that didn't have a lot of revenue, but they still managed to make a living. The vast majority of them worked with what there patients could provide, and didn't refuse treatment due to the patient's poverty level. When it's all about money, my friends, then we have lost our humanity, and the hypocratic oath might as well go out the window. All professionals are making way, way above what normal wages are in this nation, and personally, I'm disgusted by it. Disgusted by our inherent greed.<br /> 3. Money is a product of this world only, so you won't be taking any of it with you when you die. It is a resource that is meant to be USED, and if you use it for the benefit of all of mankind, think of the energy that you are spreading; good feeling, good times. Now, think if you kept it all to yourself, never benefiting anyone but yourself. That energy is sticky and dark.<br /> We need health care reform, and we need it now. If Obama's idea isn't correct, than at least try it and then tweak it to something better. Like all institutions in the government, it will eventually evolve into what it will be anyway. There are so many people who do not have health care, and personally, I am about 3 paychecks away from not having it myself. So, please, think about it. It's my own personal "no body left behind" sort of program.<br />-agJimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-6715884271011189932009-07-20T10:18:00.000-07:002009-07-20T11:01:28.114-07:007/19/2009So, my next rant is about all these conservatives in my state/area, that are preaching the end of the world and the destruction of all we hold dear.<br /><br /> Wow, <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0">Obama's</span> been in office less than 6 months, and you're already blaming him for every consequence of Bush's presidential decisions and policies. You've already established that you believe everything will go to "hell in a hand basket". But here's what you don't realize.<br /><br /> Your fear is eating you, like a unbidden monster. Your fear makes you ripe for manipulation by the ones who sling that destructive message around. Your fear makes you weak, at a time when you need your strength the most.<br /><br /> The end of the world has been predicted since forever. There have always been those people who have "seen" the end, and want others to believe that the end is <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1">imminent</span>. Neither I nor you know when the end of times is here. Right here, right now, we can make a difference in our immediate world, and potentially the globe, but not from a weakened place of fear. We can only have a positive effect from a strong position of hope, courage, and peace in our hearts. There's no room for peace in a heart full of fear.<br /><br /> You talk about your religion like it means something to you, and yet you do not follow the tenents of your greatest prophet, your savior! You believe that torture is OK, as long as it insures your safety (By the way, torture does not insure your safety). Yet, would Jesus follow that same path? Do you think that he was sometimes afraid to turn the other cheek? I feel that he sometimes had second thoughts, but he set that fear aside so he could give us a message of peace and love; compassion for our fellow man. He wouldn't have approved of torturing prisoners, and neither should you. He wouldn't have approved of the messages of doom and gloom that you spread like a disease. He would have had a message of hope and love. And you know it.<br /><br /> So, get over your fears. It is time to set them aside so you can join the ranks of life that is worth living, and make a better place for your children and their children, and so on. Have the courage to not only believe what you believe, but to act in a manner in accordance with your religion. Get a grip, please. Not all is doom and gloom, and although the economy may get worse before it gets better, we will weather this a lot better than a poor person in the third world. So why all the wailing and gnashing of teeth?<br /><br /> Why not hope for the best and work for that, as well? Would it really hurt you that much to have a positive attitude and belief in your God? I don't think so. And quit spreading your disease onto the masses. None of us need to hear your message of doom.<br />-agJimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-66764514677586728282009-07-15T07:59:00.000-07:002009-07-15T08:10:44.586-07:0007/15/2009So, I recently installed the internet, and boy have I been playing! I found a game to play, not WOW, but very much like it, and was instantly hooked. We won't go into the fact that I have an addictive personality, but suffice to say, I played it as much as humanly possible. Finally, I think that compulsion has worn a bit thin. And one of the problems I have with this type of game is the inevitability that you have to have friends to make it through certain places, and I feel more comfortable working alone. I like games and puzzles, but if I screw it up, I'd rather be the one who gets the hit, if you know what I mean.<br /> I have also joined up with a couple of groups in the city who are involved with metaphysics and all things related, and so hopefully this will get me out of my shell a bit and out there with more people. I think I'll leave the game alone for awhile, and try real life (yuck!).<br /> Do you know what's weird? I know what I need to be doing to get my life in the right place, and I'm not doing it! I wanted to find a symbol for "obey the direction of God / Obey the will of spirit" so I could prominently display it, in the hopes that this would remind me to get this done!<br />I'll meditate on that and see what I come up with. Later -agJimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-905174677350300972.post-21797887218343701472009-06-21T06:22:00.000-07:002009-06-21T06:40:46.251-07:00Jimena Rants<span style="font-size:85%;">Well, this is cool! I needed a place to set down my thoughts, other than the 5 or 6 random notebooks lying around my house, so I have this place now. You may not want to read my random thoughts..that's O.K. </span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">It ain't about you!</span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">First thought: We attract the sickness (darkness /disfunction) in others that resonates to our own sickness. We have to heal ourselves of our own sickness before we can begin to change what we attract to ourselves, and move on to something different. </span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">This, of course, explains my love life! And you can bet that the "something different" is a sickness all it's own. There's the rub! Life is just a wheel.....</span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">Second: The fruit falls from the tree to rot in the ground. The seed within feeds off the fruit, germinates, and reaches out in the darkness for nourishment and stability. Finding that which sustains life, and taking root, the seed then pushes through to the surface, to be reborn, to touch the light of day, and find a new life to experience full of it's own challenges. </span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">So, when you are in the darkness, reach out for your nourishment and stability to you can have 'roots'. Personally, I would suggest that you look for this nourishment from those people who love you unconditionally. 'Nuf said. -Jimena</span><br /><br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span>Jimena is not my real name!http://www.blogger.com/profile/17355356565684841596noreply@blogger.com0